Laughter is the Best Cosmetic

In the October Allure magazine Ariana Grande is quoted on the cover:

“You can never have enough music or makeup.”

The superstar vocalist is bringing out her own beauty line.

In truth music and makeup have been healing modes of expression for me.

First in the 1980s when I was a disc jockey on FM radio.

Throughout my life listening to music even today.

Fugees are on the Post Modern Music Box channel with “No Woman No Cry” as I type this blog entry.

I recommend going on Audacy to listen to 100s of music stations.

My favorites are the Punk Party channel and the Post Modern Music Box channel. There’s also a channel for The Cure and for New Arrivals.

The link to Audacy will be at the bottom of this blog entry.

Elsewhere what brightened my day was cashing in my 1000 points in the Sephora Rewards Bazaar.

My Benefit brand gift was a water bottle inscribed with We Dream in Pink that changes color. A white tote bag with pink letters chiming: Laughter is the Best Cosmetic. A tube of They’re Real! Magnet Extreme Lengthening Mascara.

In the October Allure there was a review of the They’re Real! Magnet Mascara.

Smitten I was with this lash-defining product. So I will keep using it.

Music and Makeup.

I find myself listening to music at all hours of the day and night.

Lining my eyes with black eyeliner. Or using silvery-white eyeshadow.

Going through a struggle I feel good when I make others feel good. There’s a lot that’s not right in the world. So injecting humor and hope into everyone’s lives is called for.

Sephora now sells a haircare line by Tracee Ellis Ross called Pattern. Definitely worth checking out and the packaging is gorgeous too.

Here is the link to the Audacy website.

9/11 Pandemic Insight

This tee shirt I bought at a street fair in the West Village 12 years ago.

It was my chosen outfit with black jeans to wear to the dentist on 9/11. Using clothing to protest or make a statement is my preferred way of getting a message across.

Though I was afraid to have a cavity or need a terrible scraping of my teeth I was in luck. The cleaning was quicker than usual.

Before opening my mouth wide I told the dentist that I have no energy at all. That in the evening I haven’t been brushing my teeth.

“Everyone has no energy. They’re under stress. The coronavirus is no joke. Some people have it together. Others lost it altogether,” he cut to the chase.

The pandemic has been a game changer in this regard. My dentist was right about everyone being stressed out.

There should be more openness and willingness to talk about mental health issues. No one’s immune from cracks and fissures in the mind these days.

If human beings cannot be honest with each other then we’re living a lie. Game over.

We cannot go back to the way things were before.

It was hard for a lot of us to not resort to snacking on potato chips and pretzels or drinking vodka and gin while holed up in our living rooms.

None of us should feel guilty and ashamed.

Not about our bodies our health our sexuality. Nothing.

Everyone’s doing the best we can with what we were given.

To coexist. That is the only way to live.

To have compassion for each other. Even better.

Weight a Minute

Yes–I get it that OKCupid is set up to attract romantic partners.

Everyone should have my kind of dilemma:

I’m resigned to the fact that I’m a tiny person. As in a woman who would be called “thin.” Only 5’0″ I fit into a size 2 Petite.

So–I removed the words “fit and active” to describe myself in my profile essay.

I don’t want to attract men who are fixated on my figure.

You can check off “prefer not to say” as an option when it asks you to click how much you weigh.

Only why be coy? I’ve decided as a rule to not lie and live in hiding.

So–I reluctantly checked off “thin.”

You should not be afraid to check off “full-figured.” Yet go right ahead and click “Prefer not to say” if you want.

IRL you won’t fool anyone about your weight. Why not own up to your beautiful body in whatever size or shape it is?

If this gorgeous earth we live on is round why can’t a female body be round?

I’m not naturally thin by the way. I got this way because I’m muscular. For over 10 years I’ve engaged in intense weight-lifting routines.

Plus I don’t eat meat. Only (mostly organic) chicken, seafood, vegetables and salads.

My father had Stage 3 colon cancer that spread to his liver. The cancer killed him.

It’s because of this that I exercise and eat well as consistently as possible.

Being “thin” is not something to covet or be proud of. Whether a woman is skinny or voluptuous no one should be commenting on her body either way.

Oh–I suppose I could’ve clicked “Prefer not to say.” Why not? Only no one should feel guilty or ashamed because of their body and how they look.

In fact you might be able to not answer this question at all and leave it blank.

The double bind is: why should there be a need on OKCupid for the website to ask this question in the first place?

Dressing Up for Dating

The photo above I used as a match photo on a dating website.

Red is a color that attracts men. So you’re supposed to wear red if you want to boost your luck.

Seems innocent enough right? Yet it poses a dilemma. I received 55 “likes” and I wasn’t interested in any of them.

They click “like” after seeing only my match photo. I read a guy’s profile before clicking that I “like” him.

This is the conundrum: attracting men I’m not interested in.

Like the guy wearing only swim trunks and no shirt whose breasts were as big as mine.

Sorry–though I lift weights I’m not attracted to bodybuilders with bulging bodies as big as boulders.

The tee shirt is my oldest item of clothing. It’s a Product(RED) offering that went on sale the first month Bono created this campaign.

Proceeds from Product(RED) items go to support men women and children living with AIDS in Africa.

Years ago I also bought a Product(RED) red-rubber spatula.

I wish a guy who was hip to this sales campaign would send me a message referring to the tee shirt. Only that would be an impossible stretch.

My computer crashed 2 years ago. The files documents and photos on it disappeared. There were no photos on my cell phone either that showed “lovely legs” like a ZZ Top song.

I even dared upload a recent photo where I’m wearing a purple bandanna, lavender marled sweater, black coated skinny jeans, and black boots.

Men who expect me to wear stilettos are not in my target market.

On my end I don’t go by how a person looks. I read their profile essay first.

Coming up: More Fun in the New (Dating) World? Not exactly.

Rebel Love Book

Beauty lies in having radical self-acceptance. In owning your terrific soul. In honoring and trying to heal the broken parts and loving all of the pieces of you.

I believe in the beauty of everyone’s true self-expression. Not to feel guilty or ashamed for being who you are.

The book shown above by Dr. Chris Donaghue, PhD is revolutionary. It’s sad that what he’s talking about isn’t accepted as the norm.

I’ll quote from the last sentence on the last page to get readers to go out and buy this guide:

“Being the truest, most authentic version of yourself is ultimately what will transform you and your relationships–and eventually, maybe even the world.”

Dr. Chris asserts that in countries where there is a sex-positive tone and permissive view of sexuality there are fewer rapes, sexual assaults, and teen pregnancies.