Generation X Gets Dressed

Today I realized that I wrote in the Sundressed blog entry that I would talk about how reading this book changed everything in my Generation X 50s life.

The fashion we dress in and how we fashion ourselves and our lives and the makeup we wear and how we make up our minds to live the way we choose–all of this I’ve been thinking about.

It started with the changes I decided to make aligned with buying natural fabrics and branched out to ideas I had after reading other books too.

What I’ve started to do is look to see the fabric content of the clothes I’m buying. Preferring to buy 100 percent cotton blouses. Looking to buy a 100 percent wool coat to replace the houndstooth winter coat I’ve had for 11 years.

Alas, I lift weights so the training pants I buy and wear are synthetic material. This is one concession that is not eco-friendly.

Recently I checked a book out of the library titled Wabi-Sabi Home. The other guide I liked better that I checked out was Wabi-Sabi Welcome.

In only one regard I’m a fan of the Japanese Wabi-Sabi ethic: it’s predicated on valuing and flaunting the imperfect. The cracks in objects that are soldered together in gold to highlight the cracks.

In this regard it pays to talk about having a Wabi-Sabi wardrobe. Not thinking that as a woman we have to dress flawlessly with a full face of makeup.

One year ago I decided that in a roomful of women with obvious makeup seen covering their faces I’m going to stick with my eyeliner and lipstick.

As I’ve gotten older (and not gotten glowing performance reviews even though I’m a hard worker) I no longer care what people think of me and what I say or write or how I look or what I do.

I was born in 1965–the first year of Generation X. This accounts for why I think differently and see things differently from Baby Boomers.

My sincere hope is that I can change one reader’s life for the better at a time by writing what I do in blog entries..

My aim in talking about living my life Left of the Dial and being a Girl on the Left is that a devotion to doing your own thing is rooted in this firm belief I have:

There is no one–or any–“right” way to live act think feel dress and love.

Having empathy and being open-minded is the secret sauce in relationships. Too often stigma–in whatever form it appears–is baked into how a person interacts with you.

The hating and judging that goes on has been going on for too long.

This is why I chose to go left when everyone else goes “right.”

There is nothing right about enacting a law that makes ESG investing illegal. There is nothing right about fracking. Nor anything right and justified in building oil pipelines over sacred tribal lands.

My hope is that by keeping this blog I can give readers the courage to act true to yourself, think for yourself, and dress however you like.

Decide for yourself how you want to live. There’s nothing wrong with any of us. Even though the media darlings that spout divisive rhetoric would have us feel guilty and ashamed for daring to exist.

My goal has always been that this blog would be a judgment-free zone.

I’ll turn 58 in the spring. I’m too old to spend the rest of what could be a long life caring what people think.

I’ll end here by saying that everyone’s doing the best we can with what we were given.

We should be proud of who we are and what we stand for.

Don’t let anyone who hasn’t met you and broken bread with you dare impose their view of who you are in what they write.

Step away from those books and blogs and platforms.

Beyonce was quoted in a fashion magazine years ago that social media is truly democratic because it allows everyone to have a say.

In a coming blog entry–though I can’t guarantee that it will be the next one–I will talk about how we can all be Advocates for each other and for the planet.

We could all use more love and less critical bashing of who we are and what we stand for.

So I say: if you’re going to wear polyester–by all means do so.

I couldn’t resist the silver-coated pants that called out to me either.

Pretty Good Advice

In her book Pretty Good Advice: For People Who Dream Big and Work Harder Leslie Blodgett wrote: “When you see beauty you become beautiful.”

The author is the founder of Bare Minerals the makeup line. I recommend you buy her book which is why I quote from it.

As the year ends I’ll quote another beauty–South Korean model Sora Choi who was quoted:

“To me, beauty is when a person is living and embodying their truth, no matter what that is.”

On the cusp of 58 I’ve learned that no one else gets to speak for me. Only I can speak my truth, or else others will impose on the world their view of who they think I am.

2023 I envision as the year when everyone is free to live and embody our truth freely and fearlessly.

We should be acting to lift each other up. Not cutting each other down. I stopped reading editorials because the hateful rhetoric only serves to divide people instead of bringing us together.

Believing is seeing. Believing that others are beautiful you will see the beauty in everyone.

It starts will looking in the mirror and feeling that you are beautiful.

I’m no saint. I won’t be exercising this week. I view this lapse like taking a holiday vacation week.

If I could give my own Pretty Good Advice I would end here with:

The two foolproof ways to achieve any goal–even a New Year’s resolution coming up–are to understand that change will happen incrementally. And that compromise is called for when you can’t do what you want to do in one day or in one week.


It’s time to unshackle ourselves from self-limiting beliefs. Internalizing shame about who we are will rob us of the energy to set goals and go after them with gusto.

2023 is going to be even better than 2022 was. I firmly believe that whatever happens in our lives we can live through it and emerge stronger and better.

Hiding our light is no way to live. Beating ourselves up because we feel like we’re a failure is no way to live.

I urge followers to see the beauty in yourself and everyone else.

Together we can move mountains of hate. We can create the world we would like to see.

More coming up on what I’m doing to shift the needle toward love and forgiveness.

No Hello Kitty

The Italian written on the Davines holiday box stated the hair products were for capelli indisciplinati. The Italian word for frizzy hair sounded like undisciplined–which described my incorrigible hair.

So, I was willing to save up the $75 to buy the shampoo conditioner and leave-in treatment that might just help my hair blossom into gorgeous after all these years.

Who exactly did I want to look beautiful for?: Every guy I sent a message to on OKCupid ghosted me after my second response. I got the idea that circa 2022 things hadn’t changed: It was okay for a woman to open her mouth to kiss not speak.

My photogenic face compelled men to click “like” on my profile. A few guys went further and sent messages. What’s with the “likes” guys? If you like a woman, send her a message–don’t be coy. We’re not communicating via the Pony Express–this is 2022.

I got the idea that they were shocked when a pretty face had something intelligent to say. Not what they were expecting Cupid to shoot them with?

Getting ghosted. Every. Single. Time. I got the hint and canceled my account.

Not relishing spending an hour or two every day reading match profiles to see who I wanted to send messages to. Acting as a caregiver to your mother you have no energy or time left over to conduct love combat in the hopes of getting one man in your scope.

Pat Benatar got it right: “Love is a Battlefield.” It doesn’t have to be this way.

Living my life Left of the Dial I’ll use the hair products for my own joy and love.

What was I going to do instead of hunting for a boyfriend? I’ve begun sending emails to my Republican congressperson asking her to do the right thing on humanitarian causes.

One January night 12 years ago I attended a candlelight MLK Vigil for Peace. Five of us–I had thought hundreds would show up–stood in a triangle park holding lit votive candles.

My candle fell on the cement path and broke. After giving the host of the vigil my email account ever since then I’ve been sent in my inbox pleas to act on social justice issues.

Ever since Mr. Toupee–my nickname for Donald Trump–became president the emails have escalated. LL Cool Joe–President Biden–has been no saint either.

Sending messages to Nicole CacaCola–my moniker for Malliotakis the Republican who won the election–is my way of participating in our Democracy.

A girl in the world who’s an Activist I can’t get any play on OKCupid. The men want to Meet Cute. Then when they find out I’m No Hello Kitty they bolt.

This holiday season since I have no love interest–I’m going to wash the men right out of my hair–and wash and condition my hair with the Davines products.

What’s cooking in my Protest Kitchen? Peace Love and Happiness.

This is what the world needs. We don’t need endless wars, bipartisan bickering, and the ongoing hate.

Have something to say. This is what I would tell readers: use your lovely lips to speak out.

Our time is here. We have the opportunity to change society for the better.

Whether or not our hair is frizzy. And whether or not other people like that we have loud mouths.

The Black Feminist Project

Tanya Fields the founder of the Black Feminist Project in the Bronx, NY was interviewed in Women’s Health magazine.

What she said: “It’s a little ridiculous for people to see activism as a job as opposed to a responsibility to create a better world.”

Tanya Fields launched Black Joy Farm. On a sliding-scale fee families can have fresh fruits and vegetables delivered in their South Bronx neighborhood.

What if activism was no longer needed because there was no injustice anymore? Then the task for humanitarians would be uplifting others in different ways. Like doing motivational speaking to inspire teens to graduate high school.

There’s likely always going to be a cause to advocate for. The Tanya Fields activists of the world deserve credit for making their corner of the world a better place.

You can log on to The Black Feminist Project to donate money and buy their tee shirt and read about the nonprofit.

Something to think about as holiday time nears.

Grape Expectations

The 11th District election showdown is in full swing.

In her TV campaign ad Nicole CacaCola [Malliotakis] wears a purple sweater.

I see right through that clever marketing ploy.

Purple is a color that signifies spirituality.

CacaCola voted NO to giving American workers national paid sick leave.

She voted YES to funding the Pentagon with upwards of $1.4 trillion dollars.

Money that would be better used helping Americans buy food when we go hungry.

Giving every citizen 18 and older a $1,000 per month Universal Basic Income (UBI).

In a book I checked out of the library about ending poverty one of the solutions listed was giving Americans a monthly UBI payment.

Not that Max Rose the Democratic contender is a whole lot better.

Afro-Latina Brittany Ramos DeBarros who I voted for didn’t win the primary.

Though she garnered 20 percent of the vote which is phenomenal.

A woman I corresponded with said she votes–and she lobbies after the election is over.

Which is what I do even though no candidate can do everything you ask them to do.

I’m no fan of CacaCola’s funding of the perpetual war chest.

She wouldn’t debate Max Rose on TV. This leads me to believe that CacaCola knows she wouldn’t stand a chance if she had to speak for more than ten minutes on real issues.

The Green Party has gotten kicked off the ballot in New York State.

We are also voting for Governor. In a match between Kathy Hochul and Lee Zeldin.

Hochul appears brilliant in the TV campaign ad I saw her speaking in. Not trashing Zeldin. Stating her victories on gun control and other measures. The TV ad was impressive.

I have yet to come up with a catchy nickname for Max Rose.

Hopefully this last week before election day doesn’t turn into a barrage of TV ads with potty-mouthed Staten Islanders taking profane pot shots at Max Rose. Like two years ago.

Brittany Ramos DeBarros should’ve won the primary.

Who I vote for is a mystery I have no idea about. Though no way will I be voting for CacaCola.

Here’s the trick: ever since the first George Bush the father invaded Iraq with Operation Desert Storm in 1991 I refused to vote Republican after that.

Twenty-six years old then why did I think that war wasn’t justified?

This is all I’ll say about politics today. Coming up my latest great nonprofit that I’m donating money to.


At first I thought DNA testing amounted to a parlor trick. Then I changed my mind. Sprung for a 23&Me DNA kit.

My intent in doing this was to connect with others. Be a citizen of the world.

My DNA composition:

95.2% Italian – Sicily + 9 other regions.

Western Asian and North African 4.5%

Northern West Asian 4.3%

Iranian Caucasian Mesopotamian 2.6%

Cypriot 1.4%

Broadly Northern West Asian 0.3%

Broadly Western Asian & Northern African 0.2%

Trace Ancestry: 0.2%

Unassigned: 0.1%

The weird facts section of the report was amusing:

45% chance of slightly wavy hair.

Yes I was born with wavy hair.

Think this percentage should’ve been higher given how unruly my curly “summer hair” is.

Coming into October my “winter hair” will be in effect–straight all day when I blow dry it.

Fear of public speaking:

Less likely to have a fear of public speaking.

Hello–I perform on stage at poetry readings. I do motivational speaking in front of audiences in rooms.

I recommend springing for this DNA testing. It’s a fun amusement more than anything.

The 23&Me DNA kit costs $99. Or $89 if like me a friend who used it gives you a discount code.

Love Welcomes Mat

The photo is of the welcome mat woven by a woman in the Love Welcomes collective of refugees in Greece.

The mat features upcycled fabric with strips of the life vest they wore to escape their home country.

It cost $65.50 total which is a fair price. I’m gearing up to make a donation to Thistle Farms the nonprofit that sells the welcome mats and other products on their website.

Today I’m tuned in more to what’s going on in America and around the world. Every day in my inbox I get social justice emails.

Just being aware of the injustice is the start. Then we must act together to defy the status quo and do what we can to change things.

I was born in 1965—the first year of Generation X. The older I’ve gotten I’m more committed to seeking justice.

I’m 57 and a child of the 1980s. Like the famous Mr. T in that long-ago TV show “I Pity the Fool” who would mess with me after they found out my story.

The quote is that we can’t just seek to change the story. We must change the storyteller.

Giving column space to unique voices and the original perspectives of often-silenced individuals is called for.

My time on OKCupid having crashed and ended I’ve decided to turn my sights on my Advocate work instead.

One thing I’ve done is to publish a second book a career guide for peers. It was my attempt to seek economic justice for people with mental health issues traditionally shut out of employment.

The goal as I see it is to get to the point in society where Activists can go out of business because there’s no more suffering in the world.

As I’ve always said in here one person reaching out to help another person is the way to go.

I have my eye on a pair of earrings on the Thistle Farms website.

Coming up a review of a biting and brilliant book on the fashion industry and the size inclusion revolution.

Thistle Farms

I check out of the library business books shelved in the 658s. At the end of Story Dash the author recommended readers check out Thistle Farms.

Located in Nashville, TN in America the non-profit was founded to give women survivors of human trafficking and addiction housing and employment.

There’s a free 2-year residence for recovery in Nashville. Thistle Farms also sells goods that women around the world handcraft.

The home decor and apparel and jewelry items are sold on the Thistle Farms website. I’ll link to Thistle Farms at the end of this blog entry.

There you can buy a beaded bracelet as cheap as $10. I have my eye on a welcome mat that refugees craft in Greece using strips from their life jackets.

A great find is a black leather tote bag for $99. It’s the kind of pocketbook that stands out. Why order a handbag from Nordstrom online when it will be a mass-produced item that everyone will be carrying everywhere.

The goods sold on the Thistle Farms website give fair trade employment to women living in countries throughout the world.

There are so many great finds on the website that I might break my vow not to spend money. I’m tempted to throw caution to the wind and buy something to support Thistle Farms.

Check out Thistle Farms today.

Brittany Ramos DeBarros

Yes–I promise I will talk soon about the way to do good and make a difference that I discovered last week.

For now I have the urge to preempt my regularly scheduled programming. With a startling thing that happened.

I tune in to the Post-Modern Music Box channel on I’m stuck in this time warp listening to the alternative music of my youth (1980s/1990s).

You can imagine the shock I was in when an 11th District candidate for Congress advertised herself between songs as an “anti-war combat veteran.”

This was uncanny marketing on the part of Afro-Latina Brittany Ramos DeBarros who lives on Staten Island and served in Afghanistan.

How did a political candidate know that an anti-war person like me would be listening to the Music Box channel? That’s a brilliant plotting for votes.

I’ve always thought these American invasions were unjustified. Upwards of $1.4 trillion is being given to the Pentagon.

This money would be better served to give every U.S. citizen 18 and older a $1,000 monthly Universal Basic Income– a remedy to help end poverty here.

Every night as I listen to 1990s alternative music Brittany Ramos DeBarros invades my ears. I’ve gone on her website and her platform is legit.

Nicole CacaCola–the nickname I’ve given to Nicole Malliotakis the current 11th District person–responded to an anti-war email I sent her after she was sworn in. She told me it’s OK for the U.S. to engage in war in Syria and Yemen. That it’s perfectly fine to sell arms to Saudi Arabia.

OK then–what is the U.S. government using this money for after we get it?

CacaCola voted NO to giving American workers national paid sick leave.

A book at the library attacked the U.S. for starting these allegedly “humanitarian” wars that only serve to ravage the citizens and natural resources in other countries.

I can’t say LL Cool Joe–my nickname for Joe Biden–has been any better. He’s allowed the U.S. collusion in these wars to continue.

In one week I’m going to vote for Brittany Ramos DeBarros. I’ll be stunned if she wins. Hardly anyone I vote for wins an election.

Coming up:

The method I discovered for doing good that helps women in America and around the world recover from human trafficking and addiction.


I realize that not every woman is like me. Some of us might think abortion is equivalent to a crime. Or simply that they would choose to have a baby and keep it if they got pregnant.

Their right to have a baby should not be viewed as the only choice that is acceptable.

If you are a woman who is against abortion that should be your personal choice. Yet your right is not the only right that is “right.”

Soon every other right that a person has in America is going to fall one after the other. Now that Roe v. Wade has been rejected.

Using my iPad I curiously could not bring up other websites because the Chrome browser gave this error message: The URL could not be verified. Chrome wouldn’t even verify its own Google URL when I typed in

Remarkably the only website I could type in successfully in Chrome on my iPad was the New York Times. That’s where I saw the headline that the Supreme Court ruled against Roe v. Wade.

The Supreme Court has taken away women’s right to have an abortion.

With access to birth control hard to get and no ability to have an abortion women in America have been sent the message that our only role in society is to be a Wife and Mother.

The No Sex Outside of Marriage and Marriage is for Procreation edicts of major religions relegate American women to being celibate or being Breeders.

Viewing women as dumb dumbs who can’t decide for ourselves who we want to love and when and how.

As a woman with a disability I’m going to get crucified for not having wanted to bring into the world a child who could develop a chronic illness or severe disability that is permanent.

Today it’s not up to me or you to decide whether or not we want to have kids. The Supreme Court has ruled that women don’t have this right.

No couple would adopt the kid of a woman who had a medical condition or a disability. They would be the exception to the rule if they chose to adopt a child who could develop schizophrenia or bipolar.

Besides most couples adopt children from China right so you can’t claim they’ll be swayed to adopt American babies.

What is up with adopting kids from China when American babies need loving homes?

“Adoption is an Option” is what Conservative men driving Chryslers stick on a bumper sticker on their cars.

No–adoption is NOT an option for a lot of women.

We have tactics for sending a message to those states that make abortion illegal.

One strategy might not work yet it bears talking about as persons who can satisfy our own social justice ethic:

Refuse to go on vacation to a state where abortion is illegal. Refrain from doing business with that state.

Take your tourism money elsewhere.

This might barely make a dent in the state’s coffers. Yet at least you could have peace of mind for your own sake.

I will live in New York forever. Not move to Florida when I retire or go anywhere else to live.

Right now I’m seriously rethinking where I’ll travel on vacation to in America.

A lot of women myself included work in a “pink ghetto” where we’re underpaid and overworked for our emotional labor.

Forcing a woman like me to have a child and raise them when we can barely afford to live on our own–and where are we going to get childcare help as single Moms?

Not all men stick around after their girlfriend gives birth to a child. Which busts the Republican myth that a two-parent family will elevate a child’s prospects in life. Not all women can rely on a husband to help care for their child.

Again–you might be a woman who is against abortion. Fine. So you don’t have to get an abortion. That’s your choice.

Let me make my choice.

Pretty soon every other right will be taken away.

The issue is that white men are deciding what’s normative behavior and what isn’t. They’re deciding who has the right to have free choice and who doesn’t.

My claim to fame is that I live my life Left of the Dial. That book title and by extension way of life will forever stick with me.

I’ve known since I was a teenager that I didn’t want to get married and raise a family.

What about you? How do you feel about the Supreme Court decision?

It will be interesting to see what happens next in the kinds of court cases the Supreme Court decides to take up.