National Lipstick Day

Today July 29 is National Lipstick Day.

Last week I ordered with a 50 percent off code a matte pink Lancome Rouge tube.

The answer to the question: I won’t leave the house without: is lipstick. As an older woman I favor shades like red and violet and deep not pastel pink.

I firmly think you can face the world with your face even when you don’t apply a full face of makeup.

After a friend told me that I don’t need to wear foundation I gave up using it except for headshots.

On an ordinary day it’s a swipe of lipstick and a stripe of eyeliner for me. My favorite is a Sephora collection aubergine eyeliner.

Little touches can inspire awe. I recommend reading the book Joyful: The Surprising Power of Ordinary Things to Create Extraordinary Happiness.

We don’t need to charge a costly vacation that we can’t afford to pay off to rekindle from stress. Often the secret to our sanity is right nearby.

Lipstick isn’t the only colorful confidence booster and cheer inducer. Bringing home fresh flowers to keep in a vase on our dining table can elevate how we feel. Colorful flowers give off a positive vibration too.

The cost of replenishing a wilted bouquet with new blooms shouldn’t deter those of us who can afford the indulgence. Really I make the case for figuring out how to find the extra cash to buy flowers even on a lower income.

Happy National Lipstick Day to Everyone!

Everything Beautiful Book

I checked the book above out of the library. The copyright date is 2022.

To encourage followers to buy the book I will quote from it:

“We want to keep hold because beauty is so often a porch light in the darkness.”

The author ends the book by talking about a new beauty that we define for ourselves. It is a form of self-care. We’re no longer trying to fit into the standard mold of beauty that those in power with authority have dictated to us as being the only form.

To end the book Ella Frances Sanders tells us:
“The new beauty is radical because it allows us to love ourselves in spite of being told not to.”

Shame thrives in secrecy, silence, and judgment. What if each us could stand in the truth that we’re beautiful precisely because of our imperfections?

What if our greatest struggle was the very thing that is beautiful because we emerge wiser, stronger, and more capable of loving ourselves afterward?

Seeing Our Beauty

My stance is that each of us needs to have a loving response to ourselves when we look in the mirror. At 60 years old I like what I see in the mirror. After too long staring at my face microscopically in the bathroom mirror and having a critical view of the skin on my face.

What changed and why do I no longer care about this? I’ve seen an 87-year-old woman with no makeup on her face wrinkles all over and a few extra pounds. She did not resort to $100 face creams or a costly facelift or drastic diet.

My ethic is to frown on going under the knife or on getting fillers and using filters.

The fact that material objects like designer clothes and a Birkin bag are praiseworthy, and our physical pulchritude has always mattered more in society than our health and happiness is whacked.

I feel for Linda Evangelista who has joined the 50+ club. Beauty in traditional terms is often an accident of birth. Such beauty can open doors. Only what’s behind those velvet ropes is often not the best environment for feeling great about ourselves.

Under the strobe lights it can feel good when others stroke you. Wake up in the morning to frizzy tangled hair and the remnants of yesterday’s makeup and you’re back at the drawing board needing more affirmation.

Far better it is for each of us however old we are today to look in the mirror and like what we see. This is the first step in liking others.

Perhaps a dose of listening to the Billy Joel song “Just the Way You Are” is in order. He didn’t want his lover to go changing. The singer liked her just the way she was.

I say it’s time—it’s always the right time—to do what’s harder. It might have been the natural response to be harsh on ourselves.

Let’s take a beat to see the whole picture—that is the whole photo—instead of picking apart each part of our face or body. Find one thing we like about our body. Play that up.

The Beauty issue of Harper’s Bazaar this month has a playlist of songs you can download to listen to. The songs talk about being beautiful.

Harper’s Bazaar Beauty Issue

On the cover of the Beauty issue of Harper’s Bazaar this month is supermodel Linda Evangelista’s quote: “Beauty is Earned.”

It’s not a given that women feel beautiful about ourselves.

The fat on supermodel Linda Evangelista’s skin hardened after she used the Coolsculpting technique to tighten her body that was getting older and out of shape.

No longer beautiful in the way society always valued her to be the damaging side effect of Coolsculpting sent Evangelista into talk therapy.

Too sad it is that ordinarily women put everyone else’s needs first or worse cater to others instead of our own health wealth and happiness.

In a coming blog entry, I’ll talk about Christine Platt’s insight shared in her new newsletter about how each of us should act “self-ish.”

Too often supermodels are only human like we are. They travel the globe on photo shoots and spend countless hours racking up air miles. Even when closer to home their schedules are tightly packed and could be frantic.

Having to smile at the camera when inside you’re insecure about the very body everyone loves to look at.

Evangelista wrote that no one in her history of modeling told her the exact words: “You’re beautiful.” It was always a comment on how the clothes looked on her.

Evangelista vowed to tell her son and everyone else: “You’re beautiful” every chance she gets today.

There should be no judgment here about whether Evangelista took care of her health all these years.

In the next blog entry, I’ll talk more about looking in the mirror and liking what we see.

Of course everyone living on earth is beautiful. There’s no doubt about this. We can start by telling our loved ones and friends that they are beautiful.

A Colorful Way of Living

I recommend that everyone buy and read the book above. I checked it out of the library and read it in 3 hours.

The cofounder of the Vera Bradley lifestyle brand wrote the guide. Round about 12 years ago I bought the Vera Bradley messenger bag seen in the second photo.

I will quote from the book in this review:

“Look for ways to put beauty where it doesn’t exist,” Vera would say.

“That very colorful way of thinking evolved into one of Vera Bradley’s driving principles–We create beautiful solutions.”

What beautiful solutions–to living our lives; to how we connect with each other; to what we think and feel–can we design and refine?

Creating memorable experiences like the Vera Bradley team does is the second way to craft happiness.

How about for a dinner party use cloth napkins and a ceramic pitcher? Change the tablecloth and use a different centerpiece each season.

Little touches can make a big difference.

There’s beauty everywhere if we open our eyes to see it.

Today more than ever in America it’s time to do what I coined: Take a B.I.T.E. out of life–to express Beauty Individuality Truth and Empathy.

A colorful way of living is the best way of living if you ask me. Accepting and embracing all colors and creeds of everyone living on earth.

The cofounders of Vera Bradley had an Aha moment about designing colorful bags after a layover in an airport when they rued the drab neutral colors of the luggage women carried.

Vera Bradley was Barbara Bradley’s fashion model mother.

With $500 in seed money they built a brand worth half a billion today.

Per Barbara Bradley everyone should Be Nice. If being nice is good enough for her I’ll take this from other people too.

We should not be afraid to show our True Colors. We can do this in style with a Vera Bradley handbag.

Cheers! to living colorful and loving colorful and laughing colorful.

My About Face

I figured something out when I was 55. That’s round about the time I checked out of the library a book detailing how attractive people earn more money on the job.

Since the 1990s I’ve read that women who wear makeup on the job earn more.

It begs the question: Does a pretty face get promoted even though they shirk doing work–over a plain face that works hard.

At one job I thought that if I could wear a full face of makeup on that job I’d get a better performance review.

Whatever. I couldn’t muster the ability to wear foundation blush eyeshadow–the works–after this. No longer thinking that I should spend my whole life trying to impress people.

I gave up wearing a full face of makeup after that. An old friend told me years later: “You don’t need to wear foundation.” I took her word for it.

For years so far I’ve applied only eyeliner and lipstick every day. I will leave the house only if I’m wearing lipstick. I’ll use mascara instead of eyeliner at times. There’s always lipstick.

A bathroom mirror should come with a warning like at a fire scene: Stand back 500 feet. You don’t view a work of art only five inches in front of the canvas. And every human being is a work of art.

The thing that clinched not caring about outward beauty / seeking a fountain of youth / hope in a jar was acting as a caregiver.

At 86 you won’t fool the Grim Reaper even if you look like you’re 40. If you’re 60 or older and fixated on youth that’s likely understandable in the context of mortality.

I’ll end here with what I’ve learned: How you look can take you only so far.

At 59 I can tell you that the sooner we abandon the low self-esteem the better off we’ll be. If we’re not good enough in the eyes of others no matter how good or compassionate or beautiful we are (and we are!) that’s their issue not ours.

Plus I think using an iPhone camera makes everyone look beautiful : )

What do you say? Isn’t it time to lighten up our faces?

The Benefit brand white tote bag gets at this in pink letters:

Laughter is the best cosmetic.

I think a sense of humor looks good on everyone.

Sartorial Self-Care

One way to defy the womanly norms expected of us in the patriarchy is to dress to please ourselves. No man is worth starving ourselves and becoming precariously thin for.

In coming blog entries I’ll talk about weight again. In here I’m going to write about real life-affirming self-care.

Years ago I thought the Visual Therapy Style Quiz was fascinating. Then I became disillusioned with it as I wasn’t satisfied with the outcome.

At the time it was like I was going through an existential fashion crisis by wondering what my style type was and should be.

Enter Allison Bornstein and her Three Word Method. She advocates that your Style is found by examining the clothes already hanging in your closet.

After two weeks I figured out my three words were Chic Quirky Confident.

Sartorial self-care can be the most joyous form of loving, accepting, and nurturing our authentic selves–and bodies at the weight we are today.

As a 200-pound woman when you dress sharp not only can you feel better you can inspire other 200-pound women to feel good and be confident in their bodies.

Having clothing confidence is not frivolous and isn’t shameful. The way to like ourselves is to dress in the ways that make us happy.

I for one don’t follow fashion trends unless I truly like the color or clothing items being touted.

When dressing up gives us such joy and happiness no one else should be judging us for liking fashion.

Turning to a clothing rack when the going gets tough can really be a form of self-care that sustains us.

In fact it can help us feel better when we’re not rail-thin!

The Beauty Issue

The current Harper’s Bazaar is the Beauty Issue. Ever since Samir Nasr was elevated to Editor-in-Chief of Harper’s Bazaar the magazine has gotten better. I like HB more than Vogue. HB features social justice articles together with fashion columns.

Ever month I turn to the Market Memo and other pages in The Bazaar section of the magazine. It’s a great way to get inspiration for new outfits to create by “shopping in my closet.”

I’m set to read the book I Survived Capitalism and All I Got was This Lousy Tee Shirt. It’s geared to Gen Z and Millennials yet I’m going to read it soon.

In a future blog entry I will talk about a better alternative to consumerism that I will title Sustain-Ability. The average person according to research buys 63 or 66 items of clothing every year. How is this possible?

I’m going to write about Sustain-Ability which is also Beauty in its own way. I will detail how spring cleaning has become a thing of the past for me.

In the coming blog entry I will talk about a book I bought for my birthday from Barnes & Noble. Reading this guide kickstarted my focus on Sustain-Ability.

Rouge

The novel above is spiky, surreal, seductive. Forget that it received only 3.8 stars on Amazon. I recommend that everyone reads this book.

Though fiction the narrative exposes the dark side of the skincare industry. By the time I got to only page 119 I had no interest in buying and using anti-aging creams.

The book should turn all readers off from seeking eternal youth. Save your hard-earned money. Use it to donate to charity. Buy a new shade of lipstick guilt-free. Our skin is beautiful even with lines and wrinkles.

Rouge is the gold standard for the craft of fiction. The book should win a literary prize.

You can check it out of the library if you can’t buy it.

Love is All Sizes

Just like I think “Love is All Colors” I believe that “Love is All Sizes.”

It’s no prize or virtuous feat to weight 105 pounds.

Match.com used to feature a member’s profile on their homepage.

One guy wrote: “I won’t date fat women.”

That was the first thing you saw when you logged onto Match.com.

How much did a woman have to weigh to be over his ideal weight limit.

If I gained 10 pounds would he divorce me.

Would 150 pounds be too big? Would 135 pounds be just right?

Could he tell by looking at a woman that she was too big?

The MetLife insurance criteria listed that a 5’0″ woman should weight 100 pounds and 5 pounds extra for each inch above 5’0″.

Livid I was that Pamela Peeke, M.D., M.P.H. used this guideline in her book Body for Life for Women.

No girl among us should weigh less than 115 pounds unless we’re one of the exceptions who are rail-thin naturally.

A social worker told me stress causes weight loss. Wouldn’t you rather have no stress and weigh more.

Raisa Flowers the makeup artist easily appears to weigh 220 pounds. I tore out of a fashion magazine a photo of her wearing a colorful-crochet Issey Miyake dress because she looked beautiful. Inserted it in my fashion binder. Yes a famous designer sells gorgeous plus-size clothes.

I would like once and for all for every one of us girls to love the skin we’re in. Whether we’re voluptuous or skinny or in-between.

Take it from me: 105 pounds is no prize. Though there’s no shame wherever the number on the scale lands.

105; 205: Love is All Sizes.