Seeking Justice

I would like to ask the question: What is Justice? The online dictionary defines justice as right action.

Too I think it does a disservice to parrot that being kind and caring isn’t good enough. The way I see it the best way to “dismantle oppressive systems” is not only to fight injustice at its core. The other method of creating justice lies in how we treat each other in our relationships.

If you ask me it won’t do to judge and demonize people for their efforts in either fighting or not fighting injustice.

Love is Justice.

Recovery is Justice.

Compassion is Justice.

Seeing how each of us treats each other as justice is the difference.

Vowing not to follow along in what the haters in society tell us to believe about everyone is critical.

We each of us also need to be kinder to ourselves when the outside voices of critics attack us sight unseen.

I say that people can change and this is a good thing.

At 20 or 22 or even at 30 or 32 we’re tasked with attending to our own struggle to overcome the lemons that life handed us. Whether in the form of illness, disability, being born on the wrong side of the highway, or whatever.

I’ll give my own story to highlight that judging each other isn’t the way to go.

Today I often think of my earliest attempt at seeking justice. In 1988 I sought justice for myself in terms of economic security. By fighting for the right to have two things normal people take for granted they can have: Renting their own apartment to live in and working at a full-time job.

I think it’s synchronicity not just a coincidence that after I recovered for over 15 years I’ve helped customers create resumes and conduct job searches at my job. Upwards of 85 percent of those people received job offers not just interviews.

This is to say that as we get older each of us holds in our hands the power to not only transform our lives and heal ourselves. We can create positive change for others.

So I urge followers not to despair if you’re ratted out as not doing enough for the cause of justice. Each of us taking whatever right action we can is wonderful resistance to the status quo.

There’s no shame at all in seeking to better ourselves first if we’re not in a place in our lives to agitate for everyone’s rights.

We are good people doing the best we can with what we were given.

A friend gave me a bookmark with this quote: Never forget the difference you’ve made.

I firmly think each of us is making a positive difference simply by acting true to ourselves.

Individuality is Justice too.

Beauty and the Boots

purple boots

I’m thinking more about the confessions in the Patti Smith article in Harper’s Bazaar.

She invests in coats and boots which has been my game plan in recent years.

The idea that your fashion gives you freedom resonated with me. Boots aren’t traditionally sexy when they’re the type Smith wears.

This is what cheers me as a cisgender woman. That you don’t have to wear stilettos to make a statement about who you are and what you stand for.

The boots above I bought in December in a shoe-buying frenzy. I decided that boots were going to be my thing since I really don’t care to totter in stilettos and pumps.

I”m not keen to wear classic pumps. Not after having worn them for 9 years to legal and corporate office jobs in the 1990s.

A lot of guys on internet dating websites express an interest in meeting a “sexy” woman. The definition of sexy is erotic. I don’t want to walk down the street with everything hanging out for men to see.

It gives me hope that if Patti Smith had a husband and was an iconic rock star that I can meet a guy without having to wear a skintight cleavage-baring dress with a slit up to there.

I’ve decided to wear booties and boots on dates. Mid-heel black booties and the purple ones shown above.

The Bazaar article is right: fashion gives you freedom.

On the cusp of 55 today I think about how we can use fashion as a means of expressing who we are and what we stand for.

There’s a beauty in expressing your Individuality. That’s the ticket to living in health harmony and happiness.

I want to talk more in coming blog entries about searching for Mr. Right. A person that in my case should be Mr. Left in terms of politics.

The Beauty of Individuality

The online Merriam Webster definition of stigma is “a mark of shame or discredit.”

I’m not keen to use the term stigma to describe what is in effect a lack of compassion for people who are different, who might not look like you, who might have an illness.

Too often the word stigma is framed as the cause of people not seeking help for mental health issues.

My memoir Left of the Dial chronicles my own fear of not being normal.

In 2020 I would like to be part of the solution to what’s going on in the world.

For too long narrow-mindedness has ruled in society.

I can identify with individuals who were subjected to “conversion therapy.”

I can relate to people who were told to conform and give up their dream of being an artist.

What I’d really like to do is contribute to the dialog about how to heal from stigma.

No one should feel guilty or ashamed because they don’t fit the mold of what other people think is acceptable.

It’s so easy to fall into the trap of internalizing this stigma.

On the cusp of 55 I’ve decided to promote individuality as the remedy.

The only way to succeed in life is to be who you are not who others would like you to be.

In coming blog entries I’m going to talk about the beauty of individuality in more detail.

On Individuality

As I roll into another birthday all of this resonates with me:

How repressing our Self leads to ill health.

How what makes us different makes us beautiful.

How daring to be vocal about what’s not right in the world is not only necessary it should be expected when we reach mid-life.

My literary agent is working with me on a book proposal project. She edited one sentence. She replaced the word Visionary that I used and changed it to radical.

What I write is radical at times. I write things and talk about things that no one else is writing or talking about.

I’m often the first one–and the only one–doing this.

As 54 beckons, and I look around and see what’s happening outside around me I can’t help but think that courage is warranted.

We need to have the guts to stand up and shout about it when something’s not right.

We need to have the courage to stand tall when other people refuse to treat their fellow human beings with dignity.

It’s sad that acting true to yourself is seen as courageous.

It should be expected and accepted that every one of has the right to be ourselves.

This struck me more so as an inviolable creed after riding a crowded city bus one night.

I came home and realized that the way to live is to have no fear.

So I would like to tell readers of this blog: Dare to be You.

God broke the mold after he made you. God doesn’t make junk. God doesn’t make mistakes.

Whether you are Christian or not and whether you practice some kind of actual religion or not I trust you can understand the underlying theme:

Basing how you live–even so far as deciding how to dress–on fear of what people think, on fear of standing out, on any kind of fear is not the way to live.

The older I get with my life getting shorter I think:

“You don’t have time to waste trying to impress people who are cowards.

You’re the only one who has to accept and be impressed by yourself.”

It’s a fool’s errand trying to conform to what other people tell you is the only way to live, act, be, and dress.